No noise suggests no bees

Man, this city can provide some serious laughs, most of which are at the expense of TTC passengers. My commute to work takes about 40 minutes in which I have to take a bus to the subway station. Today on the bus there were a couple of textbook stereotypes, not to be mean because i'm sure this girl is a nice person, but c'mon! this poor girl was reading this book called "lords of chaos" or something to that effect and it had all these dragons, elves, hobbits and shit on the cover. She looked exactly as you are picturing her in your head right now: heavy set, poor complexion, ugly glasses and sweat pants. I was very intrigued with this female comic book guy and it took someone to take it up a notch. Enter the pedophile. This guy gets on the bus a few stops later and sweet sassy molassy if I was a cop I would arrest this guy without any evidence because I am certain he has touched a kid in an innappropriate way at some point in his life, probably animals too. Another textbook case, he again looked just as you are picturing him in your head: pedo glasses (like the ones wheels wore on Degrassi), slimy mustache, jeans that scream "I like young boys!", which i'm sure you can only get at secret pedophile swap meets because you never see anyone but creepy dudes wearing them and of course he had that disgusting perverted pedophile grin. I actually burst out laughing, which caused a few confused looks my way since I had my headphones on and it was probably quite loud.
A lot of people say things happen in three's and today was no different. I'm on the subway about 3 or 4 stops from my destination and a guy, who can only be described as a foreign humpty dumpty gets on and stands right in front of me staring me in the eyes for about 10 seconds. He was pretty short, so we were actually eye to eye and after the awkward stare down decides to plop himself down in between myself and the girl that was on the same bench as me. Like I said he was a rotund individual, so this made it very uncomfortable. Not too mention this guy smelled like what I would think the scene of a car crash between a car full of hard boiled eggs and a car full of mothballs would smell like. The worst part is that there were a bunch of empty seats around, so there was no need of him wedging himself in between us.

Well i'm finally going to have my own room as of January. I've been sleeping on a pullout couch in my friend's bachelor apartment ever since my girlfriend and I broke up in October. Pretty stoked on that one, even if it is back in the very same room we used to share. She is moving out of the apartment and i'm squirreling my way back in. Now I just need a bed, I happened to notice a mattress on the side of the road the other day, so heres to hoping its still there because you haven't lived until you slept on a strangers soiled mattress.

Well thats all for now friends, keep plugging away and one day maybe you can achieve your dream of owning a used mattress!